You know you're a hard-nosed, repeat mother when your infant starts to throw up and you tilt him towards yourself so your own shirt gets dowsed in regurgitated breastmilk because you have already changed his outfit twice this morning and you just can't imagine doing that wriggle rodeo again. Besides, it's much easier for you to change out of your ratty old t-shirt and into another equally ratty one.
You know you're an old hag of a woman when you have fed and bathed both of your children, gotten them in their jammies and changed into your nightgown and then you take a moment to look at the clock and you realize it's only 6pm.....and you're exhausted.
You know you're not a hot, young thang anymore when you whip open the shower curtain to ask your husband if he thinks your c-section scar looks crooked and he actually looks at your scar, says "No" and continues brushing his teeth.
You know you're a boring old parent when you and your husband get so excited to find a sale on kids shoes that you high-five each other, buy six pairs, and then talk about how awesome it was to get those shoes on sale, for the next 5 days.
You know you're over 30 when you get unusually excited when one of your christmas gifts is a pair of socks or a crockpot.
You know you are comfortable at someone's house when you can sit on their couch and take out your breast to feed your child.....and in my case, then request a cocktail. ;)
You know you are truly, madly, deeply in love when a small, toothless person can pee on you, poop on you, vomit on you, and chomp your bosom but yet your heart still turns to warm jelly everytime they smile at you.
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