Sorry to all of my Fan ;)

....but I've been on a blogger break.
Let me collect my thoughts, upload photos from the holidays and I'll get back into the swing of things again, asap.

Love to all,
Blog to you soon!

Jess

Joy to the World, I broke my toe

I am not pleased.
Yesterday, I was rushing around trying to get us all dressed and out of the house when I took a corner too fast, except my baby toe stayed behind...hugging the doorjam. Ugh. Whenever you hear a "crunch", you know it's bad. So I dramatically fall to the floor screaming....yes, I'm obnoxious, "Ahhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh!".
Carter pokes his head around the corner and says, "Mommy? Booboo hurt you?", to which I reply "Ahhhhhhh!".
You'd honestly think since I did the whole natural childbirth thing that little things like broken toes wouldn't phase me. Yeah well *shrug*, it hurt like hell. Pain is pain.

I figured I'd sprained it before and so maybe I should just tape it to the other toes and get on with my day (not the best idea but this was very inconvenient so therefore I was in denial). Okay, fast forward 2 stops and 4 hours later as I'm prying off my shoe; 'that's a lovely shade of purple', I think to myself, and 'my what an interesting angle...'.
*Sigh*
My least favorite thing to do: call the doctor, because I know this is going to cost me a fortune and be a totally unpleasant experience as I drag two very tired and crabby children into the office. Of course, it took two hours even though they said they could see me "right away". Limping, hauling baby in carrier and making sure toddler doesn't run into oncoming traffic is not my chosen Trifecta, if you will (I much prefer vanilla stoli, baileys and frangelico. haha, mmm).
To make matters worse, the hubband was out-of-town so the afternoon and evening was very interesting and loooooong.
I ended up being sent home with a stupid looking shoe that probably costs about $600, that I have to wear for 4 weeks. Great. No offense to the Post-Op Shoe Industry but I would much rather spend that kind of cash on some Manolo Blahnik's, thank you very much (at least then I'd get a matching pair).

Anywhoooo, that was my day. Merry Effing Christmas to me. Ha.

The holiday season and weekend getaways

The last few days have been such fun! Well, at least Saturday and Sunday have been.... Friday was just bad. Very bad. Mental patient bad. I could have used a Whiskey I.V.


Buuuuuut, Saturday I woke up excited because Kevin and I were going to the Coast for his work Christmas party. I was viewing it as a Romantic Getaway of sorts (with our 2 month old). Hey! At least I didn't have to argue, barter and finangle my way through another weekend with my 2 year old; he was staying at home with Grammy & Papa. Oh joy!

(note: I missed the hell out of my youngster despite all the hoops he makes me jump through on a daily basis)

We had a hotel room at The Grand so we loaded up our mini van and a Uhaul for one night away with ourselves and our 2month old baby. Just kidding, of course, about the Uhaul but our mini van was packed full of crap. Why do kids require so much stuff when traveling?? I guess it's more me than anything. I like to be prepared for any situation.

Anyway, we checked in and got situated and it was so......quiet. I mean we were staying in a casino hotel but I mean it was quiet; in a way only a mother of two who left the older chatterbox at home, could understand. :) I could actually hear my baby coo gently and Kevin and I could hold a conversation from beginning to end. It was weird.
We got ready to go to the party and headed out. I had bought a pair of larger dress pants on the way down because I was unwilling to wear maternity clothes but I opted not to get a new shirt. I figured my red sweater would be stretchy enough to fit, and it was....but it fit a little too well, if ya know what I mean. Unfortunately I spent most of the evening self consciously tugging at the form fitting waist of the shirt trying to pull it down over my odd shaped belly and camel humps. Ah well. I got through it.
So we are dressed nicely (Kevin was quiet dapper) and we are toting our 2 month old along. He was so amazingly good. I nursed him at 6:30 or 7:00 and put him in the stroller with a little blanket tent and he was good to go. (note: he ended up sleeping until 3:30 that morning, even with being transferred to carseat and then to bassinet in hotel room) During the Christmas party I got the mix of looks and comments from people ranging from Why would she bring her baby to a party?! to Ahhh, I wish I brought my little one along.... I can't please everybody but survival is key and I neeeeeed to be able to hang out at social functions now and again. I just do what I have to do.
Mommy got to have a couple of cocktails (yum) and didn't even need to use the back-up breast milk. Yeah!
After a lovely night sleeping in the most comfortable bed in the world and not getting kicked in the head, we went to the breakfast buffet. It was relaxed and fun and it totally recharged me. Mother's guilt set in sometime between the walk from the room and my made-to-order omelette. Sigh. So we stopped off at the overpriced gift shop for a Pwesent for Carter. I knew since I said I'd bring him one that he would remember. The days of him forgetting things like that are long gone. He has a memory like an elephant and he'll call you out on things you tell/promise him. It was an agonizing decision, "Hmmm, 20 dollar penguin or 20 dollar alligator....". :) The alligator won out and has since never left his side. He was pleased. I live to serve.
After we got home and attacked our youngster with kisses like we had been gone for weeks, we lazed about all day until dusk when we all loaded in the car again and headed out to see some awesome Christmas lights.
For all of you non-locals, the Lewis Lights are THE place to get some Christmas cheer. This family out in bfe starts decorating in October and by December 1st they are on from 5:30 until 9:00pm every night until New Years. They are amazing. You walk along a path that is strung back and forth across their property and covered with some 15,000 lights (I think that is what they said...is that alot? I dunno). Plus, it's free. Free fits our budget very well, I might add. They take donations to cover the exorbitant electric bill, though.
I'm so glad there is something like this for the little ones especially. Carter absolutely loves it and we try to go a few times each season. This time he grabbed the camera and took a picture of every display. I will have to post some of them because I was pretty surprised how well he did lining them up in the frame and all....maybe he will be a famous photographer. Look out Ansel Adams!
Check some of these out, and keep in mind, he's two...... and we are obnoxiously proud parents... and this is my blog and I can post whatever I want. :)

Well that was our weekend.

Last night I got to the Wrapping of the Presents. *sigh* I never thought I would get sick of seeing the same wrapping paper. Remind me next year to buy more of a variety....and to organize all of my wrapping supplies. Egads! It's a mess.
Christmas is fast approaching! What happened to December being soooooo long that it was actually painful. I remember thinking that Christmas would never come. Haha. Time flies when you get old.

(I have no idea why blogger won't let me alter this last paragraph so it's not right on top of those pictures but whatever....looks sloppy. stupid.)

Sieze the Day! (or anything for that matter)

This is all about Owen.

We have "Mr. Personality" developing. It's pretty freaking cute and since I don't plan on having any more children I am really trying to savor it all.
So lately, Owen will wake up in the early morning and I will hear him laughing and talking to himself in the cosleeper. He'll do this for a good long while sometimes dozing in between chuckles. What a nice way to wake up your mommy!! I swear he is so sweet I can't get over it. He doesn't even cry that hard when his brother squishes him with his 2 year old loving toddler body. What a trooper.
His latest baby achievement is grabbing everything within his reach, and Man! is he proud of himself. He squawks with joy when he gets his paws on his Whoozit! or mommy's hair (he laughs hysterically when he gets my hair...I dont' know why but I love it). When he gets a baby blanket in his ninja grasp he pulls it up and down in front of his face like he's doing Peek-a-Boo. Funny.
He's my googly sweetie pie. Love him, infinity.

Yes, it does snow in Mississippi

Well, if you can call this snow..... It's more like icy, mush rain but whatever, I'll take what I can get. According to Carter it is just like "DaDaDaDa-Dora's kissmuss". Here he is scraping the snow off his ride.

Yeah!! Daddy's home to build a snowman!

Hmmm, he doesn't look too happy at the final product. If you haven't figured it out...the snowman is the 12 inch pillar of ice with the sunglasses and stubby carrot-nose.

Awwww, he loves his little brother.

My little men are my world

Okay, I'm not one to post many posed shots where my children look perfect and polished....mostly because this never happens. So I mostly post pictures that I think are cute or funny or relate to a funny situation. In the above picture you see my chubby 2 month old half undressed. Why, you may ask? Well, I got tired of trying to gently wrestle the froggy guy out of his arms and gave up and got the camera. He refused to let him go so I could get his clothes off! I finally gave up and let him play with his "friend" for a while and did laundry.

I love this picture. Owen is in his Bumbo seat and Carter dragged out his Baby Bjorn potty that he has never used for the actual purpose it was made for...he'd much rather push it around the house and use it as a chair. They are looking at each other like "Are you my brother?".

The brothers wrestling already.

Okay, right before I took this picture Carter said to me, "Me? mama milk for Owen?", and lifted up his shirt. I wasn't sure what he meant until he was leaning in towards the baby.....OH! he is going to "nurse" baby Owen. Funny. Owen does not look amused, however.

Our early December antics

My oldest elf workin on his tree.

My youngest elf workin on his cuteness.

Dinosaur shirt and obnoxious Saints hat....a winning outfit. Add Santa accessory and we are ready to face the day.

My little punkin and his froggy guy. I've never seen a 2 month old who was so attached to a lovie before. It's pretty funny. He hugs it and tries to eat it's face. You see him sitting up like a big boy? I love this Bumbo seat thingy!

The boys over the last couple of weeks

"Here ya go, Owen...play with my truck. You like?"

Here are my two crazy boys. Poor Owen looks slightly uncomfortable in his brother's lovin arms.

Check out my wild man's Vogue pose.

"Helping" mommy decorate the Christmas tree. Ayiiee!

Hectic Holiday scramble

I had a moment today when I really thought about how many poopy diapers I change a day. I am just a giant, lactating pooper-scooper. There I was feeling guilty that my husband takes out all of the baby diaper trash and the other garbage everyday and then I was like, huh? I am knee deep in poop all day! But thanks anyway, honey, for all of your hard work and chores you do when you get home. :) I pree-shee-ate it.

Anyway, I felt very productive this morning. Forgive the list but it is important to understand my accomplishments.

-I got up (grudgingly)

-got coffee-d

-fed both kids (different breakfasts of course)

-wrapped up packages to take to the UPS store

-collected addresses

-gave toddler a haircut

-showered him

-showered me

-got dressed

-got kids dressed and cleaned up

-packed diaper bag with fresh snacks

-got in car with everybody and didn't forget anything (this is an achievement). It was only 11am. Woohoo!

-mailed gifts off from UPS (only sweated a little bit as Carter "helped" them move boxes around store)

-went to Target after making a deal with 2 year old that he would stay in the cart if I got him a "Tweet".

-got a bunch of crap, checked out, got home and realized I was missing something that I paid for already......CRAP! And I went there for Scotch tape and hair dye (because I have dingy post-partum hair) and of course I forgot the tape. I was doing soooo well! *Sigh*

Anyway, I did all of this with a quiet, sweet baby and a little boy who listened to me relatively well. I only had to bribe him with Christmas marshmallows, mini candy canes, the promise of hot cocoa later and a Diego bubble blower piece of crap, 2 dollar toy. Not bad for some sanity and no tantrums. Before I realized my mistakes I was on a high and wanted someone to High-Five me.....so I asked Carter for one on the ride home. He's my buddy.

Of course, once I realized that I screwed up, I was just deflated. I suck at this.

*****
Funny thing: At the UPS store a lady was talking to Carter and asking him if that was his baby in the carrier. He said "Uh-huh. Baby come out Mama bewwy!" and proceeded to lift up my shirt to show the nice lady my E.T. belly. Thanks, son.

Gettin' in the Spirit

We are going a little light on decorating this year as we had many broken things last year. Carter will slow down and actually hear the word "No" one of these days, right? Anyway, we still have our Christmas Spirit! So join us in a few Carols!

To the tune of Jingle Bells:

Ahem. MeMeMeMe Meeeeeeeee. (throat clearing)

"Jingle Bells, my house smells,
Will someone vacuum, please?
The Christmas Tree is under siege,
and I still wear Mat-er-nity... Hey!"

To the tune of O Christmas Tree:

"O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
Thy branches plucked and pulled constantly.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
Thy ornaments mashed and bent awkwardly.
My laundry Pile rivals thee,
it's stacked up high in wrinkled glo-ry.
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree,
thoust beauty drowned in laun-dry."

Carter has just ordered me to "Stoooooop Singgggging". Scrooge.

Oh the funny things he says and does

While playing outside today...
Carter- "Build house, Mama!", digging with his shovel in the sandbox.
Me- "You're gonna build us a house?"
Carter- "Me build, Owen build, Dada build, Mama build us house!"
Me- "Are you gonna go into construction when you grow up? Are you going to own a flourishing construction company?"
Carter- All smiles he says, "Yeah, like dada fooo-lish!"
Hahaha, out of the mouths of babes.... :)

*****

Carter likes to "rescue" snails when he is outside. Ya know, those really small ones that kinda end up dying or drying up on the patio. He arranges them into family groups on the table and they are his pets.
So today it's windy and his Mama snail, Dada snail and baby snails kept on blowing off the table.
Carter- "Aahhhhhh! Save you shail! Hold tight!" gripping them close. He gently places them back on table but wind blows the smallest one away again.
Carter- "Ohhhh Nooooo! Baby go home.", pouting... "Shail go far, far, far, far, far, far, far away...." , followed by grumpy frown.

*****

Me- "What do you want to do today?"
Carter- "Ummm... Cook!", jumping up in the air with hands raised like it is the most ecxiting thing he could think of.
Me- "Okay, what do you want to cook?"
Carter- "Pupcakes! Pink pupcakes. Spin rooound!" making stirring motion with his hand (referring to the hand mixer).

It's a good thing that one of his christmas presents from Grammy and Papa is a K-I-T-C-H-E-N. This is the only way I can refer to this item nowadays, spelling. We spell everything. I actually had to stop myself spelling to Kevin during a conversation and Carter wasn't even in the room. In fact, he was sleeping. This is Parent Conditioning.

*****

I have the politest child on the block, now. He says Please and Thank You for EVERYTHING. All day long recently I hear "Tank you mama!" and "Pleeeeeease, mama? Pleeeeease?" with hands clasped desperately to his chest and knees bent in a type of begging crouch. We are also abusing the "Sooowrry mama" accompanied by the chin-to-chest pout. I have even had to tell him to not apologize because I'll stub my toe or something and he will apologize to me like it was his fault. Geez louise. I hope we are not giving him a complex.

****

Watching the Wonder Pets...
Pets singing "...this is Seeerious!"
Carter- "Seeerious!" singing back to the them.

*****

Carter walks into the kitchen the other day and says "Mama, tuhmmy gwowl"
Me- "huh?"
Carter- "tuhhmmy gwowl! Me hungy"
Me- "Ohhhhhh, hahahahahaha. Your tummy is growling and you are hungry??"
Carter- "uh huh, Hungy! Now!"

Where do they learn some of this stuff?

*****

Carter recently re-discovered his "practice" baby doll in the pile of toys.
Carter- "Baby Owen doll!"
Me- "Is that your baby?"
Carter- "No. Owen!"
Me- "Ahh"
So he starts talking to the baby "Owen" and putting him in the swing, "You like swing baby Owen? You like?"
Then he takes him out and carries him to his bouncy chair, "Owen you like toy chair? Baby chair like?"
Then he gave the doll a teddy graham and walked away; nurturing period officially over.

*****

And to cover both kids.....
I must say that Owen slept last night from 8pm until 5am. This was confusing to me when I woke up and looked at the clock. I thought I was dreaming.
My littlest munchkin is of course the sweetest thing on Earth and I always want to remember how he says he loves me with his full body wriggle, gummy smile and giggle. So damn cute. He's truly a lump o' sugar.

Stuff of little consequence

I'm thinking about taking a blogging break.
We are sick, sick, sick people in our house. Moan groan. My throat hurts.
Kevin and I argued about comma's tonight. We are lame, lame, lame people.
I am trying to remember all of the adorable and cute stuff the kids are doing to blog about later.
I still hate, hate, hate Thanksgiving. It used to be nice but now...not really.
I like getting packages in the mail. I stalk the mailman. His name is Paul.
I want to drink Bailey's on the rocks in a snifter and sit in front of my DVD fireplace and listen to my Billy Idol christmas cd.
I want to go cuddle my sweet little sick boy who is now curled up with his octopus blanket and his bunny...lovingly snotting on my pillow.
I want to go stare at my wee small babykins while he sleeps. I like to watch him breathe. It calms me.
I am dreading the Wrapping of the Presents.
I need a haircut and color. A boobjob. A pedicure. A tummytuck... and so on, infinity.
I hate my cat.

Fin